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22/02/2021 6:33 pm
JUST ONE MORE TIME!
How often have we lost a loved one, and wished that we could see or talk with them "just one more time"? How often have we been too busy to get together? How many times have we said, "We need to get together" or the usual response, "Let's stay in touch".
Whether it be family or friends, we've all done this. But then, as is always the case, we get busy with home, work, schedules, and time goes by. It's called life getting in the way.
Suddenly one day, you get the news that, that special someone passed away. We're hit with the haunting feeling that we didn't have a last chance to get together. We didn't have that last chance to talk. We say to ourselves, "If only I had just one more time".
There are things we'd like to say to them, things we'd like to share with them, and most of all, we'd like to be with them and hear their voice "just one more time".
Today would have been my Dad's 95th birthday. It's hard to believe that he's been gone almost 40 years. He left me back in October 1981 when he was just a young 55. Still after all these years, I miss him. I wish I could talk with him "just one more time".
My Dad, like me and all of us, had his faults. But he always worked hard to assure that I had a roof over my head, clothes on my back, and food on the table. As every father does, he gave me advice and left me lessons to learn from. Not all the advice was always good and sometimes the lessons I learned showed me that he wasn't always right, but his intentions were always with my best interests in mind.
I miss my Dad. He always told me that, he and I would, "Be pals to the end". I took for granted that "the end" wouldn't come as early in my life as it did. I had just turned 30 years old when he died. I've always wished that he could have known his grandchildren, the person I became, and that he could have enjoyed a long healthy life and retirement.
I smile about the things my Dad did for me, that I took for granted at the time, and I'm sad I didn't tell him how much I appreciated the sacrifices and struggles he endured doing the best he could for me. I remember being upset at his memorial service, as many who attended told me how proud he was of me. I'd hear, "So you're George, your Dad always talked highly of you", and some would tell me he was "so proud" of me. I came away angry because he never actually told me that he was proud of me or said that he loved me.
I now understand that I had no right to be angry, because I'd never told my Dad how proud I was of him either, and that I loved him. Both of us took it for granted. I would sure enjoy giving him a hug "just one more time".
Dad, I was always proud of you and loved you. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
22/02/2021 6:56 pm
George, what a fine tribute to your father. Your reflections and missing his part in your life was likely made worse by his relatively early departure. He sounds like he was a good father. The things that we never say when we had the chance, not knowing how fleeting that time may be, continue to haunt us. MY father died in the 1980s also and, being male, we did not say many things to each other that we should have. I also think about the minor conflicts which inevitably occur between the generations. Age matures us as do our losses. I have tried with my children to be open and express my pride in them more often.
Thank you for posting and sharing this very fine memorial on your dad's birthday.
22/02/2021 7:53 pm
Great tribute to your Dad, George!
A father/son relationship is special, and important, and I feel badly for so many kids in the current generation that are growing up in a single parent household.
I was lucky enough to have a Dad who lived to age 91. I was with him on his birthday, in the hospital, and he died 2 days later. I was fortunate to have a Dad who told me that he loved me (and vice versa), and uncharacteristic of his generation (WWII veteran), he was affectionate even in public, we'd kiss each other (on the cheek) for a hello greeting. He made me into the kind of Dad that I am today and I let my son know that he benefits from what rubbed off from his Grandpa on to me!
P.S. George you'll be glad to know that although he never owned one, his all-time favorite car was the '59 Olds. And his last car was a '96 Olds Cutlass Supreme.
This post was modified 5 days ago by Moe Parr
22/02/2021 8:18 pm
Very, very well said George and nice of you to share your thoughts.
Topic starter
22/02/2021 9:14 pm
@moe-parr, thank you for sharing about your father as well. He had to be a cool guy if he liked Oldsmobile's. 
And I agree with about so many today who are in single parent families without fathers.
Irony of that is that I had the reverse of that. My Dad and Mother divorced in 1960 when I was eight years old. I was the oldest of six kids at the time, but it was more complicated than that. Two of the kids were the result of infidelity from my Mother. When my parents separated, my mother didn't want any part of me, my two sisters and a brother, so my dad at age 33 was faced with taking us with him.
To complicate things, he didn't have a place of his own, so each of us were put in to different foster homes. Over the course of the next three years, I was in three different homes, as were my siblings. Living in someone else's home, never really gives you sense of belonging and a lot of confusion and sadness can result. In 1963 my dad finally bought a house and we were brought to live with him. Each of us were challenged by these early experiences differently. My sisters felt isolated not having a mother, my younger brother continually got in to trouble with drugs and the law.
Me? I ended up being the babysitter of the kids as my dad worked two and three jobs to make enough to support us. The other personal issue for me was that he leaned on me and I carried all of his personal problems on my shoulders. I was his sounding board for everything, and as such I didn't hang with kids my own age, participate in any normal kid activities, or really have any close friends. My dad suffered with depression and struggled to cope.
If I'd not submerged myself in my love for old cars, enjoying super-hero comic books, and having old school pro wrestling to entertain me, I've many times doubted I'd have made it to adulthood. This is why I've always felt that if one has hobbies, they have a friend in those hobbies. The above is just a nutshell of the total picture, as it was far more complicated.
But with my hobbies and a deep faith in God, the latter of which I found on my own, and then being blessed with a beautiful wife for the last 47 years to share life with, I've enjoyed life.
23/02/2021 6:40 am
Great story George!
My (short) story is about my two dads. I’m 67 & I never knew my biological father, as he & my mother divorced before I was born (they were married for two years). Thanks to my research on Ancestry, I “discovered” him, but unfortunately did not locate him before he passed in 2017 at the age of 89.
But my real story is about the man, my “step-dad”, who met & married my mother when I was four. He “stepped up to the plate” & did something for me that a lot of men (including myself) wouldn’t do for a child that was not biologically theirs...he adopted me & raised me as one of his own - without him, I would not be the man I am today.
On April 22, my dad will be 89 & he’s in very good health. I have great respect for him, I am proud to be his son & I hope & pray I have many more years with him.
That’s my story & I’m sticking to it... 
This post was modified 5 days ago by TerrySlekar
The People’s Republic of Maryland
23/02/2021 7:04 am
Terry, That's a great story and you should stick to it. Thanks for sharing.
TerrySlekar liked
23/02/2021 7:50 am
There's one more part to my story - I didn't find out about this until I was 62 & 1/2...my family tree research "surprised" me one day with a little tidbit that led to an avalanche of information...imagine my surprise!
The People’s Republic of Maryland
Topic starter
23/02/2021 7:53 am
@terryslekar, I like your story too. I'm thinking though that you may be short-changing yourself just a little. I'm guessing that if the circumstances were right, and you found the right woman with a child, you'd have stepped up and been a good father, just like your own "step-father" was.
23/02/2021 8:22 am
That's entirely possible, but I'd be much younger & not so set in my ways...I was just meaning that I wouldn't do it today, but then I'm a grumpy old man now...LOL
The People’s Republic of Maryland
georgeschire liked
23/02/2021 8:24 am
BTW - here's the dad I never met...(I must take after my mom as I don't have his ears)...LOL
...and then there's me @ 18...
This post was modified 5 days ago 2 times by TerrySlekar
The People’s Republic of Maryland
georgeschire liked