Laws That Matter.
 
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Laws That Matter.

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David Green
(@david-green)
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I DIDN'T BELIEVE THESE LAWS AT FIRST, BUT HAVE FOUND THEM TO BE TRUE FROM ACTUAL EXPERIENCE.
 
Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.
Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
Law of Probability- The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
Law of Random Numbers - If you phone a wrong number, you never get a busy signal and someone always answers.
Supermarket Law - As soon as you get in the shortest line, the cashier will have to call for help.
Variation Law -If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now.
Law of Close Encounters - The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
Law of the Theatre & Hockey Arena - At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, always arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the end of the performance or the game is over. The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies and stay to the bitter end of the performance. The aisle people also are very surly folk.
The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only 2 people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
Law of Physical Surfaces - The chances of an open-faced jam sandwich landing face down on a floor, are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.
Oliver's Law of Public Speaking- A closed mouth gathers no feet.
Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy -As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.
Doctors' Law- If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better... But don't make an appointment, and you'll stay sick. 


   
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(@100ford2003)
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😂 David !! I love them all especially Oliver’s Public Speaking Law 👍

Thank-you

Steve



   
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(@ed-davis)
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All good. Thanks again.


Ed Davis
Inverness, Illinois, USA


   
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(@sizedoesmatter)
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Love these...too many good ones to pick just one. Thanks David.


John Bono
North Jersey


   
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(@grockwood)
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They pretty much describe my life experiences. 😏 🤔 


This post was modified 3 days ago by grockwood

   
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(@perrone1)
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These are fantastic! Except for Law of the Result. In my experience, it's the opposite: Try to prove to someone that a machine DOES work, and it WON'T!



   
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(@bob-jackman)
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I believe I have experienced every one of these laws and some more than once.



   
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Geno
 Geno
(@geno)
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What Bob said. Thanks David.😂🤣



   
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(@jack-dodds)
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EXCELLENT!



   
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(@perrone1)
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And maybe one more, Law of Inevitability:  If anything can possibly go wrong - it WILL.



   
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(@sizedoesmatter)
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Posted by: @perrone1

And maybe one more, Law of Inevitability:  If anything can possibly go wrong - it WILL.

For certain!

 


John Bono
North Jersey


   
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Paul Rouffa
(@paul-rouffa)
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Posted by: @david-green

 
Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
 

In my experience, they will either land on your toe or bounce away never to be seen again.

 



   
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