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27/06/2025 8:41 am
Nine Important Facts to Remember as We Grow Older:
#9 Death is the number 1 killer in the world.
#8 Life is sexually transmitted.
#7 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
#6 Men have two motivations: hunger and sex, and they can't tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.
#5 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months, maybe they won't bother you for years.
#4 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital, dying of nothing.
#3 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
#2 In the 60's, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is weird, and people take Prozac to make it normal.
#1 Life is like a jar of jalapeno peppers. What you do today may be a burning issue tomorrow.
27/06/2025 8:48 am
HA! I love them all. But don't forget #10 When you run out of stuff to do - make a list like this! 
27/06/2025 8:51 am
"I love them all. But don't forget #10 When you run out of stuff to do - make a list like this!"
- Yep! ...and Yep! 😀 😀
27/06/2025 9:42 am
Love it!!!
John Bono
North Jersey
27/06/2025 10:56 am
Great. Thanks for this inspirational post.
Ed Davis
Inverness, Illinois, USA
27/06/2025 2:38 pm
I find #6 to be rather offensive; it seems to suggest we males are shallow which is so wrong...we're like.....deep sometimes. Anyways enough of this drivel, I'm starving; think I'll make a clubhouse and fries.
27/06/2025 2:59 pm
you're right Jack, it IS offensive! Women, especially, think of us as shallow. Why, just a couple days ago a gorgeous young woman offered me Super Sex. After thinking about it for a second or two I said, "At my age sweetie, I'll have the soup!"I find #6 to be rather offensive; it seems to suggest we males are shallow which is so wrong...we're like.....deep sometimes. Anyways enough of this drivel, I'm starving; think I'll make a clubhouse and fries.
28/06/2025 10:39 am
I'll bet she was a real tomato
28/06/2025 10:42 am
28/06/2025 11:54 am
@perrone1 Yeah I bet she was...real tomato soup with a bit of crackers thrown in!
28/06/2025 12:48 pm
There you guys go, getting deep and philosophical again! I was just getting interested in hearing more about Jack's sandwich.
John Kuvakas
Warrenton, VA
28/06/2025 4:04 pm
you're right Jack, it IS offensive! Women, especially, think of us as shallow. Why, just a couple days ago a gorgeous young woman offered me Super Sex. After thinking about it for a second or two I said, "At my age sweetie, I'll have the soup!"I find #6 to be rather offensive; it seems to suggest we males are shallow which is so wrong...we're like.....deep sometimes. Anyways enough of this drivel, I'm starving; think I'll make a clubhouse and fries.
My mother was quite the proper woman, but she absolutely howled at this joke and told it over and over.
Also in Atlantic City sometime in the 1960s when you paid to use the toilet, she couldn't stop giggling over the graffiti in one of the stalls:
"Hurt my soul and break my heart.
Paid a dime to cut a fart."
Great memories, and she'd be mortified that I recounted them.
This post was modified 9 months ago by Ed Glorius
Retired in Dunedin, Florida.
29/06/2025 12:24 am
@jkuvakas The Forumite Think Tanked members are very deep thinkers and collectively are the source of much cerebralness and stuff; especially after happy hour.
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