Rules of Life.

🙂

Makes sense to me.

They're GREAT! But there's more. Do a good job washing dishes for your wife and you're suddenly and forever, the dishwasher!

Oh, and how about these: Don't tug on Superman's cape. Don't whiz into the wind, don't pull the mask off the ol' Lone Ranger and don't mess around with Slim/Jim.

More wise words to live by.💯😁

@perrone1 Code of conduct for husbands to increase time available to spend with model collection:

-always ensure that you drop and break at least one piece of china consistently whenever you are asked to do the dishes.  If an automatic dishwasher is included in this be sure to mistakenly use hand dishwashing liquid for maximum foaming action throughout entire kitchen.

-always ensure that you include several red items of clothing in the wash load to ensure maximum color transfer and be sure to mix towels with dark clothing items.

-always fry food at maximum temperature to set off household smoke alarms whenever you are asked to make dinner and never use the grease splatter shield/cover.  When oven baking meat never use a grease catch tray.

-always ensure that you bump end tables and the like to ensure breakage of ornamental pieces when asked to do household vacuuming.  Always open the full vacuum dirt collection canister incorrectly to facilitate strategic dumping of contents on expensive living room carpet.  Learn to perfect feigning of confusion and frustration when this occurs.

-always be sure, when asked to clean the bathrooms, to leave the maximum amount of splatter and paper towel remnants in the bathroom area, particularly on the toilet seat, floor and counter areas and be sure to leave the best quality towels in damp condition on the tub/shower floor to give the impression that they have been used as cleaning aids.  Obviously, never do an adequate cleaning job.

@jack-dodds 

Well said Jack. My father was an expert on all these things. When I got married, he took me aside and explained them. It was not necessary, he had demonstrated them to me for over twenty years. He was great with hobbies, as am I.

Jack Dodds / David Green, gee thanks Pals! Where the HE** were you fellas in 1969, with this advice when I got married???  

@perrone1 Well let's see.....I was just 17 and tooling about in my prized '53 Ford, so I hadn't developed the subject skills at that point.

Posted by: @jack-dodds

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@perrone1 Well let's see.....I was just 17 and tooling about in my prized '53 Ford, so I hadn't developed the subject skills at that point.

Here's another, when you pass gas in public, always whip around and look at the person behind you as if they had offended you. 

@jkuvakas Exactly JK....and it is also another great reason to own a dog you can blame such offensive things on.  The cost of dog food is nothing compared to the freedom of expelling odoriferous zephyrs indoors with reckless abandon while having an immediate source of blame  lying at your feet.

@perrone1 Tony; I suspect your stint in the army may have contributed to you being too efficient and responsible at such things for your own good!

Posted by: @jack-dodds

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@perrone1 Tony; I suspect your stint in the army may have contributed to you being too efficient and responsible at such things for your own good!

You may be right Jack. Truth be told it was all a very delicate balance. I tried so hard to be good at passing inspection and cleaning my weapon, polishing my shoes and keeping my foot locker spotless. But at this time of the service, in 1967 and 1968, we were qualified, not with just 2-3 weapons but ALL that we handled. I loved that aspect more than anything and I totally destroyed everything I shot at and blew up. So what happened here at home. No explosions, no rocket-propelled grenades, no mortars. I'm such a failure - but a clean one!

@perrone1 LOL....well, they say cleanliness is next to godliness.