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Topic starter
28/10/2025 8:13 am
The following message from a Mr Dodds of the Forum Prize Committee appeared yesterday in Forum 43, but I think it might be useful to bring it to the attention of any Lounge Lizards who may have missed it.
IMPORTANT MESSAGE ON THE SUBJECT OF PHOTOS:
JK and I are very incensed to learn that an unauthorized photo of a prime candidate for our Forum Quiz 2026 Super Grande Prize has been leaked and is surfacing in auto enthusiast circles. We are heartbroken to find that spy cam images of our Luxury Touring Sedan prototype, code name Project 10 Karat Whinney-Deusie, were illegally taken at our undisclosed fuel testing facility. In an attempt to respond to minor and undeserved cheap shots regarding unsophisticated styling and poor fit and finish of the previous Grande Prize Trabant SS Demi-Coupe, JK and I decided to break the bank and reached for the stars in 2026. Alas this despicable turn of events has spoiled the element of surprise we had planned in order to maximize ticket sale revenue and replenish company coffers. We are well into this project financially and time wise, so to abandon it is not in the cards. We are nonetheless determined to find a way to increase the contest excitement to mirror the crescendo reached with the Trabant SS. JK is secretly consulting with Caribbean based artists regarding the addition of a secondary paint finish enhancement....a consultation code named "Flamingo Fenders". I fear that perhaps I have said too much, so I will leave it at that. Wish us luck and don't forget to save your ticket money for this one! Remember we are not motivated by personal profit....we do this for you.
I would venture to suggest that the Prize Committee need not be unduly concerned about this "sneak" image being revealed in public. After all, car manufacturers have been know to deliberately circulate unauthorized spy photos as a way of generating advance interest in a forthcoming model. So there is probably no real harm done, apart from the loss of a certain element of surprise.
However, if Mr Dodds and his co-conspirat fellow organizer would prefer that this unique concept be discreetly disguised during further prototype testing, they will no doubt be aware that "zebra camouflage" is often used for this purpose
and might usefully be applied in this case.
Of course, I have no official involvement in this project (although obviously I feel fairly confident about eventually being one of the prizewinners).
Just trying to be helpful.
This topic was modified 6 months ago by Graeme Ogg
Graeme.M. Ogg
London U.K.
28/10/2025 8:28 am
I do appreciate your camo suggestion Graeme as I know that you want nothing but success for JK and I but I will have no part in skinning zebras just for their hide.
Topic starter
28/10/2025 8:44 am
Right, but you have no guilt about obliging one to propel three and a half tons of Duesie at an acceptable pace, fuelled by the dangling promise of a scanty diet? Sometimes I really don't understand you at all.
Graeme.M. Ogg
London U.K.
28/10/2025 9:29 am
@graeme-ogg Just sometimes? Well that's better than I receive at home....so thanks. JK and I have, through exhausting *research (exhausting for the "engine") determined that an empty belly and a dangling root dessert, plus the post test promise of oats with molasses drizzle achieve maximum performance numbers.
* No zebras were associated or harmed in any way with this testing research
This post was modified 6 months ago by Jack Dodds
John Kuvakas and Christopher Moroni reacted
28/10/2025 9:31 am
Right, but you have no guilt about obliging one to propel three and a half tons of Duesie at an acceptable pace, fuelled by the dangling promise of a scanty diet? Sometimes I really don't understand you at all.
Excellent point Graeme. First, is one zebra power equivalent to one horse power? Second, wouldn't it be somewhat less of a hardship on the animal to pull a much lighter weight; say a KIA? And finally, instead of a carrot, what if it were a stalk with multiple ears of corn?
28/10/2025 9:45 am
@perrone1 I suspect that your comment is posted simply to prompt us to divulge some of our highly coveted research results. I will say only this and for your ears only.....consider KIA vs. Deusie and the effect of inertia. Consider the distraction factor in eating multiple cobs vs. one pointy carrot; not to mention the drag factor increase. Look to the science my friend....follow the science.
28/10/2025 10:40 am
@perrone1 I suspect that your comment is posted simply to prompt us to divulge some of our highly coveted research results. I will say only this and for your ears only.....consider KIA vs. Deusie and the effect of inertia. Consider the distraction factor in eating multiple cobs vs. one pointy carrot; not to mention the drag factor increase. Look to the science my friend....follow the science.
Yeah, I guess you're right. There's big money to be had selling off such research data. I wish it weren't so tempting. But, right again, once that Duesey gets rolling, the equine merely has to lift its legs and ride along! Stopping? Well that's why it was chosen, no doubt, for its four-way hoofen brakes. And I supposed that with all that corn would come a flatulence problem that front drive delivers. Maybe next time a design would have him in the back!
28/10/2025 12:40 pm
I was quite intrigued by how the ‘exhaust’ problems could be worked out. I an also wondering why horses and zebras, when an oxen clearly has superior power.
John Kuvakas and Tony Perrone reacted
28/10/2025 12:58 pm
@david-green LOL! Well reasoned out! Would an oxen fit in the engine bay? If so, then how about using a Clydesdale or a moose? 
28/10/2025 3:12 pm
Yea...after someone hijacked the Gearbox thread....
28/10/2025 5:46 pm
A few days ago my computer went on the fritz. Now that it's once again working, I wonder why I had it fixed.
28/10/2025 6:00 pm
Please excuse my absence. I've been trying to perfect my Zebra skimming technique, as mentioned above. So far, the Zebra manages to sink before making any progress across the surface of the cesspool holding pond out back...except, of course, for that unfortunate incident involving getting snagged on the sunken remains of the aforementioned SS TRabant prize.
John Kuvakas
Warrenton, VA
28/10/2025 6:06 pm
I'm proud to announce that our crack body restoration technician/dive expert, Boris "The Hammer," has been working around the clock to prepare our prize for its first public viewing.
John Kuvakas
Warrenton, VA
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